Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Star Wars' Master Yoda Advises President Obama on Health Care Reform: Communicating, The Role of Experts & Top 100 Lists

The virtual Disease Management Care Blog has learned to navigate the duality that bridges particles and waves, channel dark matter and access the cosmic video game that governs humankind's Sim-like existence. It is in that polymension that the DMCB discovered that President Obama and Yoda have communicated.

This exchange was plucked from a bosonic mimetic string and is shared as a DMCB exclusive for your reading pleasure.....

Mr. Obama: Master, my poll numbers on health care reform are in the crapper. I've blamed the insurers and the conservatives again to try to generate better support, but it's not working. What is your advice?

Master Yoda: As wily Cato described has, using the Force is the product but the pitch not. To recognize the flaws in the Affordable Care Act and seek to correct them, you need, young knight!

Mr. Obama: But, Master, I don't have time for that. Midterm elections are a less than a parsec away. What do you think about giving some more speeches in a tour of the heartland, like the Great Communicator?

Master Yoda: The difference learn between communicating and oratory, you must. Yes, hmmm.

Mr. Obama: But President Reagan....

Master Yoda: Silence young one! Speak the name of the greatest Jedi Knight that ever lived, do not. A rare Gladwell Academy Outlier he became.... spent decades writing and giving speeches training his superb communication talent. Many thousand hours at Earth poultry dinner gatherings helped him his skills hone. Just a rookie novice you are. Yeesssssss.

Mr. Obama: Hey, let me remind you that you're just a mix of green latex and computer animation, while I'm President of the United States and Number 1 on this list of the 100 most powerful people in health care.

Master Yoda: Silly, are you. Other insider insurance execs, ivory tower policymakers, politicians and bureaucrats in a closed information loop on that list, see you, hmmm? A way to retread old news and generate web traffic, "Top 100" lists are. Little green droppings on them, I leave. Blah!

Mr. Obama: Hey, now you're sounding like the party of no that got us in this mess in the first place!

Master Yoda: Work on me, your tired rhetoric will not [whack with weenie cane here]. Advise to jettison your mistaken notions into deep space, you I do. Best find advisors who on that Top 100 list are not.

Mr. Obama: But my administration's policy making is being formulated by the brightest folks this country has to offer!

Master Yoda: Of great danger, over-reliance on experts is. Commune exclusively on Planet C-SPAN do they, pretending that Federal healthcare Jabba the Hut is not. Lack day-to-day understanding of patient care, they do! Publish in journals that are read by few. Instead, hologram message view you must from New York Times about the future of publishing, using the wisdom of crowds this is.

Mr. Obama: You are truly wise, Master Yoda. My last question is how I can get the First Lady to don Princess Leia garb.

Master Yoda: Ahhh, brazen young pilgrim. Eternally wise DMCB also frequently that asks. Thinks its spouse looks better than a new star drive when sport she twin buns of hair, says it. When the answer to that find, a true Force become, shall you!

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