Thursday, March 11, 2010

The Health Care Industry Answers the Question Again: Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

It's been some time since the Disease Management Care Blog posted industry answers to the age old question. It's that time to ask again .......

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"

Health Insurance Industry: Crossing the road is not a covered benefit and, because we weren't informed about the bird's pre-existing tendency to cross roads, have issued a rescission effective three years prior.

Healthways: We regularly survey thousands of chickens with that question. We think this question can be applied to turkeys and guinea hens.

Lifemasters: Um, the chicken didn't make it across the road.

The PHI Institute: Compared to what?

The Dartmouth Atlas: We looked at regional variation involving the road-crossing patterns of dead chickens and can find no explanation for it. It must be preference sensitive.

Mainstream Media News: Fowl on Foul Road Prowl: Bird Defies Death, Seeks Safety From Evil Insurers!

The DMAA Care Continuum Alliance: If crossing the road was a desired outcome, our members' engagement strategies were responsible for it and that service should be covered by all health insurers and Medicare.

Academic Medical Centers: To find out, we'd like the government to fund large studies that randomly assign a valid sample of chickens to a road, another sample without a road and prospectively measure both groups over many years of comparative effectiveness research.

Medicare: So that we can be billed for it 10,000 times by a suppliers in Florida.

The Senate Confirmed CMS Administrator: blank

Bloggers: We don't know, but we'll be happy to speculate on why - or why not - for days on end.

The DMCB: To avoid having to watch the maudlin blubbering in The Biggest Loser

The DMCB Spouse: You have a ceiling to paint.

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