Tuesday, June 19, 2012

France Says Affordable Care Act Is Seeking Asylum

En guarde for the ACA
Washington DC (DMCB) - The Affordable Care Act (ACA) sought refuge in the French Embassy today and has applied for political asylum, said U.S. officials.  France's Foreign Minister, Philipe deBird announced that the Act is now under the protection of the French government while it considers its obligations under international law.

The ACA has been appealing its numerous death sentences in U.S. courts and a final ruling is expected any day now from the U.S. Supreme Court. Many legal experts expect the Court to uphold many of the Appeal Courts' decisions, which could spell certain doom for the ACA.

Various members of Congress have denounced the Act as a threat to national security and have advocated for a remote drone attack.  "The dark references to 'severability' in speeches on the floor of the House of Representatives probably pushed the ACA over the edge" said DMCB legal expert Dawn Tzume.  "It's also no accident that the ACA chose the French Embassy, since they not only support free health care but smartly sport berets and stylishly drape their jackets over their shoulders, even when they are in Afghanistan" added Ms. Tzume.
Former State Department spokesperson Wanda Ostomy charged that France may use this incident to influence U.S. monetary policy.  "The French could easily deny asylum, putting the U.S. budget back in the dumpster," said Ms. Ostomy. "They'll probably 'suggest' that we convert to the Euro and use it to finance California's 2012 deficit," she added.

The DMCB contacted the White House for comment and was referred to Nancy Pelosi's office.  "We are studying the situation and let the President know what the next steps will be," said an unnamed person in Ms. Pelosi's office. 

"The ACA is at this moment enjoying some cheese, croissants and pear slices, courtesy of the French people," said Embassy spokesperson, Jean Claude deRash. "Many of our citizens are on holiday at this time of year and we wished to extend the same courtesy to our unexpected guest," he added.

The Disease Management Care Blog will continue to follow this developing story

Image from Wikipedia

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